By: Lucy Buxton
Growing up, I’ve always been told that senior year is the most exciting year of highschool. I’ve never doubted that statement for a second, until I got here. I understand why many people feel this way because it is exciting. Senior year is the last year where everything is “normal”.
I saw a quote once that said, “The good news is, it doesn’t last forever… the bad news is it doesn’t last forever”. I couldn’t describe how I feel about senior year better than that. I love the thought of new beginnings and meeting lots of new people but then I begin to think about all that I’m about to leave behind and it seems to cancel out all the “pros” about this being the last year of “normal”.
Change has always been pretty hard for me. I remember crying about leaving fourth grade because that meant I would no longer have recess on the playground. I remember the pit in my stomach when I realized eighth grade was coming to an end, which meant soon I would become a freshman. Change used to really bother me and I didnt know why. Everyone seems to be excited about new beginnings but to me, new beginnings have always felt like a punishment.
Why do I dread leaving this chapter behind? I used to ask myself this all the time but as life has gone on, I now know why this is. Anyone that knows me, knows that I have a twin brother, Knox. Yes, he gets on my nerves all the time but over the years I’ve found myself thanking God more and more for giving me someone to experience every moment in life with. I used to look at having a twin brother as a curse. I have always had to share my birthday. For example, When I wanted a dance party and he wanted a football party, We had to compromise and have a football game with a halftime show, I’ve had to hang out with all of his friends which meant lots and lots of tackle football, and everytime someone thinks of one of us, they always think of the other.
Now, I look at my brother as one of my biggest blessings. I’ve never felt lonely in my life or at least not for long. I hear loneliness is what makes the “high school experience” so hard for some people. I’ve always had him or one of his friends watching my every move and although that hasn’t always been ideal, it has probably kept me out of a lot of trouble.
How do I leave him in a year? We’ve never been separated for more than three weeks and that’s because my parents used to send him to sports camp for three weeks in Virginia. He’s been by my side as long as I can remember. Literally. We were born one minute apart and since then we’ve only ever been a Jack and Jill bathroom apart. How are we going to survive in different cities or even states? What am I going to do when I’m bored at night and he doesn’t barge into my room? This is the final year of all of that. This could easily be the last year we both live under the same roof. As years go on and we start to live separate lives from each other, people will know us but not as “Lucy’s brother” or “Knox’s sister”. The sound of that is completely foreign to us. I’ve taken the title of being a twin for granted and now I only have a couple months to soak it all up.
After taking all of the upcoming changes into mind, I have really realized how lucky of a girl I am to have something so hard to leave behind.
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